Agent Query Letter

I have had a draft query letter saved on my PC for sometime.

Draft 1
My first draft was designed using examples from AgentQuery and advice  I read in Writers & Artists Yearbook.  The most important parts I learnt to include in a query letter are:

• Title of story:  This is easy mine it Drift.
  

• Genre:  What audience should the book be marketted for, i.e. Young Adult, Romance, Fantasy, Paranormal.  I find this hard as my story will appeal to more than one genre but apparently that is not a good thing.  What I did was choose the genre match that also would appeal most to the agent. 

• Word count:  This should be rounded up/down to the nearest thousand i.e. 50,000 words.  You can use features in word processing software to see the word count (MS Word, this is displayed in the bottom left corner of the screen).  Don't write 50,817 words.

• Description of story:  Tell them what they are investing in.  What is the story about? what can they expect?  Why will it appeal to readers? Why are you best suited to write it?

• Witers Bio:  It just needs to be a paragraph about your previous achiements.  This can be hard for new writers.  A way to solve this is to enter compeitions, write short stories or articles for the small press or donate your writing to support a book to raise money for charity. 

• Why you chose the agent:  Look at the titles that they already represent and consider whether you feel that your book would sit comfortably next to those. 

• Have you sent this to other agents:  Agents can take 6 weeks or more to get back to you if they are intersted and not at all if they aren't intersted.  However, they don't like you sending your manuscript to other agents without their knowledge.  The solution is to add a simple sentence in your letter saying 'This is a simulataneous enquiry' or something along those lines.

• Enclosures:  Have you checked their website to see if they want any enclosures such as a synopsis,  first 1,000 words or first 3 chapters?  If they do expect these with an enquiry, then you need to enclose them and just mention in your letter 'Please find enclosed.... for your consideration'

Draft 2, 3, 4, 5, 6
The first letter got my thought process going and I now needed to make it more professional.  I had a look at the examples on WeBook:  http://www.webook.com/landing/query-sample-1
It is interactive but does not display well on a small screen - so watch out if you are using a netbook. 

Studying each of the four examples I rewrote each query letter for my own use, editing as necessary.  At the end, I drafted my final version using the best bits of the previous 5 letters. 

I have asked people to read my 'perfect' letter to get their feedback.  As usual, it is always funny to hear how it isn't so perfect. 

The tricky part for me, is the paragraph about my story.  I have now redrafted that 1 paragraph a further 6 times and hopefully will get it REALLY perfect later this week.